


Novels In Our Heads

by celeztialist



Category: Brooklyn nine-nine
Genre: F/M, Post Season 4, they’re all mentioned rly except jake and amy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-09-26
Packaged: 2019-01-05 21:33:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12197832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celeztialist/pseuds/celeztialist
Summary: The air is thick, musky with an air of not awkwardness, but as if Amy does not want to touch him in case he breaks. He hasn’t been treated like that in a while, and it’s disconcerting to say the least.





	Novels In Our Heads

Jail was difficult for Jake. The cell was too small and all he had were those two pictures of Amy and he stopped being able to recall Rosa’s face after a few weeks. There’s that cut in her eyebrow. Probably a badass story that he hasn’t heard yet. All she is made of is badass stories but he knows, on his first day outside of prison in two months, that Rosa has not slept for more than ten hours.

Illness is not becoming on her; her body has become frail, skin paling now from the lack of sunlight in her cell, hair limp and with none of the shine it once had. Her eyes are devoid of any emotion. Jail has broken Rosa Diaz, but she will put herself back together like she always does.

On their first day back their is a massive celebration, with even Holt smiling at the sight of the huge confetti cannon that Charles had managed to score. Scully and Hitchcock are... there, as normal. Jake’s honestly not sure they realised he was gone. Not that they didn’t care, but they weren’t exactly the brightest.

Terry hugged them both, a bone-crushing group hug that hurts Jake’s ribs. He’s missed it, though. He’s even missed Captain Holt waiting at the door to remind him that Punctuality Is Key, a habit that Holt’s fallen into keeping up with and that Jake’s fallen into enjoying, even if its original intention was for an annoyance into a heist that happened so long ago. The Nine Nine are like his family and he doesn’t ever want to have to leave them again.

In the midst of him and Charles eating lunch at his desk, Jake begins, slowly, to look through his old files. They’re still on his desk, the way they were before he... left, messy but exactly how he likes them. Flicking through a random B and E, the familiar adrenaline begins pumping through his veins, along with an unfamiliar feeling that he thought he recognised from his time in prison. He pushes it to the back of his mind, refuses to acknowledge the pain that’s there, cracks jokes with Charles, pretends he’s nothing but ecstatic to be back at the precinct.

And Amy, oh, Amy. How Jake has missed her. He can’t comprehend how in love with her he is, their ultimately overarching compatibility. That first night, after work and after a few rounds at Shaw’s, they lay side by side in their bed. It is dark and late, and nothing sexual has happened. Jake can feel the uncertainty practically oozing from Amy. She isn’t sure what to do and to be honest neither is he: does he cuddle her? Ignore the fact that she’ll probably be crying herself to sleep too? The moonlight filters onto the sheets, and the air is thick, musky with an air of not awkwardness, but as if Amy does not want to touch him in case he breaks. He hasn’t been treated like that in a while, and it’s disconcerting to say the least. So after a while, he mutters an apology, and Amy turns the bedside lamp on, and she looks so beautiful in the soft glow. 

“Why are you apologising?”, she murmurs, a frown playing on her tired features.

“It feels different. But I love you, and I-“ Jake pauses, thinks, allows himself to collect his thoughts before continuing. “I don’t always understand why people like you will want to stay by me at my worst, but thank you...? Yeah. Thank you.” He finally admits it. And it’s probably stupid, but it’s out there.

“I love you too, Jake. And I want to stay with you no matter what. Promise.” Amy replies, her face breaking into a smile that makes her look dangerously like she’s about to cry. But instead she kisses him, and they have a talk for an hour, and they lose track of time but Jake wakes up in Amy’s arms and he’s never been more in love.

Work becomes more difficult. And he doesn’t want it to, but the feeling comes back and it suffocates him. It goes on for a week, maybe longer, before he snaps and has to leave the office and go for a long walk. It’s Amy who finds him, by pure coincidence. She’s working a murder case and decided to walk to the suspect’s apartment because of the warm temperatures; and he’s sitting on a bench, staring straight ahead, unblinkingly. So slowly she goes and sits with him, and after twenty minutes he talks.

“I can’t do it,” he says, and his voice cracks slightly. “It used to be arresting perps and looking good doing it.”

Amy interrupts. “You still look good, don’t try.” And Jake smiles, a ghost of the normal grin that lights his face up, but it’s there.

“I know. I’m damn sexy. But,” he takes a deep breath. Closes his eyes. Continues. “I’ve seen what it’s like on the other side. I make sure my perps are guilty. I don’t frame them. But knowing that I’ve condemned them to life in there? I’m breaking from two months in there. It’s hard.”

There’s a silence. Amy nods. “I get it-“

“You don’t,” Jake replies hollowly. “Sorry. You don’t get it, but it’s not a dig at you, Ames, but you don’t want to know what it’s like and I don’t want you to find out.” He finally opens his eyes again, and looks right at her.

“I know.” She responds, taking his hand and squeezing it reassuringly. “But we’ll get through it, and you’ll go back to being a great detective.”

He smiles, a bit wider this time. “‘I know.’ Han Solo.” And she laughs, and his heart lifts slightly. He’s gonna get through this.


End file.
